ambivalence a la Citizen Girl

i cannot make a decision. . . about anything.

i haven't blogged for two weeks because i can't decide what i want to say. i have about 6 posts halfway finished in my edit bin. and it's quite possible this one will end up there too.
i haven't sent any resumes anywhere because i can't decide what i want to do with my life. and do i really want to start working a "real" job if i'm going to go to grad school in the fall of '06?
i'm even having trouble deciding what i want to wear in the morning.

i haven't done anything constructive in about a month. even things that aren't constructive in the cosmic sense of the word, like reshelving boxed books or scrapbooking pictures from the last few (legitimate) weeks of my life as an irresponsible college student. putting away laundry even gives me pause to think that when the basket is empty i'll somehow all of a sudden be a full-fledged adult, and i'm not sure if i can handle that. because that would mean i'm moving forward, and that would also mean i'm standing up and saying, "yes, i'm ready real world. . .let's go."

they really weren't kidding when they told us to enjoy college while we could. now, i'm sitting here half hoping someone will grab me by the hand and point me down the road to my perfect career path/life.

if anyone else is feeling this way, i recommend Emma McLaughlin and Nicola Kraus' book Citizen Girl. it may not make you feel any better, but i imagine you'll gain some solace in the knowledge that this phenomenon is widespread enough for two authors to write a 320 page satire.


xo,

kellieannie